Dear Middle School Tara

Hello sweet heart. Its weird to hear from me, right? Im sure you’re freaking out a little and wondering how Sara or Rebecca were able to play this kind of joke on you. But its not them. Its me, love. You from the future. And speaking as such, there are a couple things I would love for you to know.

First off, life gets so much better. I know that right now its hard to see past that one kid who likes you because you tried to be his friend.. Some things don’t change. You are always going to have that guy who falls for you while you’re being a friend. Its a hard lesson, but you’ll have to learn that its not your fault for not liking him back. Don’t berate yourself. Its not your fault sweetie.

I know right now that all your friends are turning emo and wearing black. I know that you want to follow suit and that you love the same music but you feel like changing who you are to fit in isn’t worth it. My dear younger Tara, I am so proud of you. Not everyone in middle school could stick to their guns and decidedly be different from everyone around them, especially when all you wanted was to fit in.

I wish that I could go back right now and tell you that who you are doesn’t change. That the girl who secretly loved green day still exists and is now unabashedly who you wanted to be. That the girl you wanted to be, the girl who wanted to dye her hair or have a nose ring and sometimes do things her patents wouldn’t like, she exists. You would love her.

My dear middle school Tara, I wish I could tell you how fleeting middle school is. That taking Spanish and French class does pay off. That when you leave middle school you do get to see the world. Oh Tara, I wish I could tell you that the things you are about to experience are incredible. That you meet different people from different countries. That you will speak languages you had no idea about. That when you make a decision, you will follow through.

I wish you could understand now what I didn’t understand then. That the things God is preparing you for are absolutely worth waiting for. I wish I could tell you that one day you will be working at a church, and hearing incredible stories of God moving. I wish I could tell you that you’ll take you’re lunch breaks in arcade rooms and play for free till your hearts content.

More than anything, dear one, I wish I could tell you to hold on. Its a long road to get here. You’ll put yourself out there and you’ll get your heart broken. You’ll travel to a far away land and never be the same. You’ll meet people that you will never forget no matter how much you want to. But you’ll meet people that change your life for the better. Oh Tara, I wish I could tell you about your best friend. That all the girls who are horrible to you now will pare in comparison. She will open your eyes to a view of Grace. You will grow more with her and pray for her future husband more than your own.

Just hold on, beloved. Its coming soon. The girl you always wanted to be, she will have her opportunity. Everything you wanted when you were in middle school, even the things you didn’t know you wanted, they are coming. If you could just read this letter, you would understand.

I love you more than I did then. And I thank you for the things you are about to go through. You’re tough, dear. I know its just a front, but it goes further down than you think. I can’t wait for you to meet the girl you created.

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